Choose to be the "RIGHT PERSON" - Pt 2

To continue from yesterday ...

It's time to let people know the real you. Be who you are, not who you think people want you to be. You are more beautiful on the inside than you realize, and you ought to share that beauty with others. Be transparent, let your guard down, let people know the real you.

When you stop pretending to be someone else, you will come to accept yourself – accept yourself completely. When you come to accept yourself completely, you will also begin to accept others fully – accepting them for who they are and not who you want them to be. Which comes first – accepting yourself or accepting others? Neither and both at the same time. There really isn’t one first and the other second. They go hand in hand.  You cannot do one without impacting a change in the other.  It is because this is aligning us back with the One – connecting us back with the Source. And by so doing – we reconnect with God – the Divine.  And God is infinite – both the beginning and the end at the same time.  Everything happens at the same instance. We become ONE again.

Surrender your need to be what you have come to believe is expected of you.  Give up the need to be something other than yourself. That image of who you should be as determined by external factors. Be independent of the good opinions of others.  Seek in your heart who you truly are, and surrender to your nature, your higher self, to the Infinite, to the Divine. Once you surrender the EGO you will stop Edging God Out (EGO) and that EGO will diminish. There will no longer be a struggle, no resistance, no fear.  There is no suffering – and you will find peace – bliss. Suffering is nothing but resistance to God.

When you let go and let God – when you surrender – imagine the freedom you will experience. You are free to be whoever you want to be. You will be able to fulfil your purpose. You will be filled with passion. Free to express yourself fully. How will you treat those you love now? You will not be afraid to express your love completely. And you will express love freely because you are Love.  Your Source is Love. You are made in the image of your creator – and your creator is Love. You will not be afraid to show love – to give love. No worry of “what if she doesn’t respond by saying she loves me too?” No fear of “what if he doesn’t accept me?” And all the other “what if" questions become insignificant because when you give love now, you give it freely without the expectation of an exchange.  There is no ulterior motive; there is no hidden agenda. You express yourself because that is your nature. You love not to be loved. You love because you are love.

Just allow yourself to be who you are – who you are meant to be.  Anita Moorjani, author of Dying to be Me, said after her near-death-experience (NDE) – the lesson she learned was to simply be yourself; live fearlessly.  That’s what I wish you you – for all of us: To be who we are meant to be; to be who we truly want to be; to free ourselves from the EGO – free from the strive to be the image someone else has created for us OR the image we think others have for us.

Be Free – Be You.  You ARE the “RIGHT PERSON.”

Peace,

I Am Syl

Choose to be the "RIGHT PERSON" - Pt 1

This sort of follows yesterday's blog entry too.  I had written something on Acceptance earlier, but my computer decided to do an auto-shut down for me and updated God knows what updates it deemed necessary.  And strangely, when it shut everything down - this time there were no "auto save" on two documents I was working on.  So instead of being mad with the computer or with myself or with who/whatever - I take it as .. Oh well. Suppose what I was writing isn't "ready" to be shared yet.  So - here is something else that came up this morning that I had thought of writing but had not reached it yet.  Perhaps the message to me was to do this and abandon the other two (at least for now).

This morning, I came across this passage on FB. You guys already know how "addicted" I am to FB and how so much can jump at you from FB that it is an endless source of material to write about (to think about etc).  SO, here is it the passage that jumped out at me: "Everyone is trying to find the right person, but nobody is trying to be the right person." (author unknown).  First impression, ya so true - and catchy phrase too. Second impression, well ok - not "everybody" and not "nobody."  Can't make that sweeping statement that EVERYone on earth is searching for that "right person," can I? No, not me.  I also can't make the statement that "NObody" is trying to be that right person.  I am sure some people are "trying" to. But still - good starting point for me.  Makes me think of the so called "right person."  And this is connected to yesterday's topic, right?  In fact, some notes I had written following the previous entries will be shared here ...

Be that "right person."  You are perfect as you are.  We are perfect in our imperfections. In fact, all creation is perfect.  We cannot be anything other than perfect for this is the way we are created.  We are as was the intent of the Almighty.

Trying to deny ourselves - to refuse to accept ourselves - hating our bodies or any aspect of our own being is to reject the beauty of the creation. Trying to become something we are not - just to please another, or to fit in to society or an image we think society has set for us - this consumes a tremendous amount of energy. In expanding that energy, we create a continuous "friction" against nature. We fight against the Intent of the Divine. And that leads to stress, to anxiety, to resentment.

On the other hand, being who you are - who you truly are - requires no effort. We just need to let go and let God take control. Trusting that we will be led in the direction that is most appropriate for us. Like the unfolding of a flower as it blooms. We can blossom into the person that we can be and will be.  For in truth, we cannot be anything other than who we are.  But we resist this. We all struggle so hard to be something else. We want to please our parents, our teachers, our partners, our friends, society - whoever. We want to impress them - we want to be famous, powerful, rich, right, admired and on and on. You know the story.  And because we cannot be anything or anyone else other than ourselves - we suffer.  This is neither saying we should sit around and do nothing and God will just make everything happen.  Nor is this saying that we cannot be any of the above if we are to be ourselves - i.e., we cannot be famous, or rich, or powerful etc.  It is saying - we will continue to suffer and happiness will continue to elude us as long as we are struggling to be something that is not in our "nature."  I've touched on this before.  As long as we are not pursuing our passion - peace and happiness will elude us.

Life isn't about suffering. It is about joy; it is about happiness; it is about peace. Jesus says in the New Testament, "I have come that you may life and have it more abundantly." When you stop chasing the illusion and stop pretending to be someone you are not.  When you stop chasing the ideal outside of yourself and realize that all you need is within you. That you are made in the image of the creator - that in you is Love - pure love .. you will radiate that love outward to others.  You will not be "seeking" love but rather be "giving" love .. For love is who you are.  And you will have become the "right person" in stead of chasing for the "right person" in some one or somewhere else.

Ok .. will resume again tomorrow.  Will need to end here for now.  Thanks for being with me today.


Shalom,
I Am Syl

The Dream

Ok - this follows the entry I made yesterday, and it is in regards to the dream I had.  I wanted to spend a little more time on it to see if it would make sense to me. After spending the entire day and night .. here is the dream ..

I am lying in the living room (of a place I know not where). And my son (well the body is that of my son) walks through the living room and goes outside. Looked like he was carrying a basket of laundry. And when he left the room (the living room) to get to the outside – the front door slammed shut behind him. And I thought that was odd as I didn’t see him slam the door, and there is no win blowing. It felt as if there was an invisible thread that was tied to the door, and someone had pulled hard on that string as soon as he had passed the door. Those were my thoughts in the dream. In the dream, I pondered:  What just happened? Did he slam the door? Is he mad about something? Is there something supernatural going on here? So I get up off the floor and opened the door.

Peering outside, I called out his name – except it is not his name I call but that of a friend of mine. And I was about to ask him if he had slammed the door.  Right outside the room (apparently this is some kind of apartment I guess) is a walkway about maybe 3 to 4 feet wide. And then there is a grass area – and there is where people hang their clothes.  I can see he hasn’t hung the clothes yet because the basket was on the ground (grass area) and he was just walking back into another “apartment” next door presumably to get something.  Also out there on the grass area near his basket is a huge crocodile with its mouth open.  So instead of asking him whether he slammed the door, I shouted to him and asked “did you see the crocodile outside?” I was worried that he would be attacked by the crocodile.

In a flash, the crocodile lunged towards me and came into my apartment – and I had jumped backwards up onto a couch. This animal was wildly swinging around the floor in my living room where I was just lying down a minute ago. And I was thinking to myself, OMG – this couch is not high enough to get away from the crocodile. He can easily get up this couch. As I was contemplating if I could jump over the crocodile and run out the door or if I should jump onto the windows (there were to my left and next to the front door) so that I can get away from the animal. - I hear my son (or friend) responding now – with something like he didn’t quite hear me. It sounded like he was about to come back over to find out what I had asked him.  I immediately shouted out to him “Don’t come in! Get out!! Run!!!”  He must have glanced at the crocodile and was now running off and the crocodile turned to chase. He seemed to be headed to another apartment or a stairwell further ahead. I don’t really know as there was a door there. I shouted to him, “It’s coming! Run!! Faster!! And close the door behind you!”

And then I am awake! What the heck! What does it mean??  How is this even connected with the things I am thinking of or dealing with? Is there a connection? Some say dreams do not mean anything. They are just random.  I, however, think there is a message – but unfortunately I do not know how to interpret the dreams as yet.

Last night was filled with dreams again. While I woke up less times than the night before, I am still aware of the fact that every time I woke up, I have had a couple of dreams that seemed to weave in and out of each other. Sadly tho, this time – I cannot remember the details of the dreams. Any of them.

I think I really should take Wayne’s advice and get up to write down these thoughts, ideas, or dreams.  Perhaps as I do that – they will become clearer and less mysterious. I don’t know. It’s getting into a habit that is hard, because – let’s be honest, we all love to sleep too much. And when I am awaken, even if there was no so called important meeting the next day, my immediate response would be – “oh I can remember this tomorrow” (knowing from experience 99% of the time I do not remember) or worse still I would look at the clock and say “it’s only 2 something in the morning” or “it’s already past 4 AM” – I will find the excuse not to get up to “listen to the breeze” since Wayne says the time is between 3 AM and 4 AM when we are most open to the voice of the Divine. Perhaps I shall start a dream journal to start recording my dreams.

But for now – I have no idea what that dream meant.  It just occurred to me while writing this dream down - the last sentence "make sure you close the door" - is that in reference to the start of the dream? As in "close the door, don't slam it?"  Throughout this time I was thinking the last line was in reference to closing the door behind him as he gets away from the crocodile.  Could the "closing of the door" be in reference to me in my life right now - that is to say be sure I close some of the doors behind me? Let go of somethings and don't look back ever again? Hmm .. you see, thoughts do become "clearer" as you write things down.  I didn't write that dream down previously (other than to jot a point or two).  But anyway - this is as far as I have come in regards to this dream today. So if you have any idea what this dream might be, please don’t hesitate to share.

Peace,

I Am Syl

Love me by loving you

As I was going to sleep last night, I guess all that I read yesterday and the things I have encountered in the past must have been brewing in my head.  In a previous blog I had mentioned that it is pretty much a practice of mine - though I cannot say I do this every night - to listen to some recording as I fall off to sleep.  These are oftentimes recording from Dr. Wayne Dyer.  Last night I was re-listening to one of his works on the 10 Principles on The Power of Intention.  As I was drifting off to sleep, all of a sudden these words were blaring in my head.  They were literally screaming in my head and would not let off until I got up to write them down (at least part of them).

"If you hate me, it is because you hate yourself. If you love me, it is because you love yourself. So love yourself. Once you do that you will be able to love me and others too. What you hate about yourself, you will project unto me. I or others become the canvas upon which you paint the ugliness you feel within yourself.  And when you love me or another, you love the part you see in me that is you. And more and more you want to make me just like you. But if you don't fill yourself with love and only love - then you will hate me and love me and hate me and the roller coaster ride will continue on and on. The answer to fully loving another unconditionally is to first love yourself. Abandon all that idea that loving yourself and being kind to yourself is wrong and evil. It is not. Love yourself unconditionally. For when you are able to love yourself - you will also love me unconditionally. For indeed we are but One - we are connected - we are from the same beginning. You cannot love yourself without also loving me; and you cannot hate yourself without also hating me."

I get it. I get it - NOW.  And only after I get up to write this down was I able to sleep.  Yet, I have to admit - last night was not a sound comfortable sleep as I was awaken over and over again throughout the night from dreams that led to thinking. Sadly tho, I did not follow Wayne's advice to get up and write down those thoughts. I wanted to just go back and sleep as I had a rather important meeting in the morning.

So while I can remember some of the dreams - or at least the last one I had before waking up in the morning, the experience of the previous night indicates to me that there is still some processing I need to do on this matter.  I feel like I am on the verge of finding out a course for my direction .. where am I headed and what am I to do.  So let me stew on this for awhile .. and let's see where it brings me to tonight. I will come back to this tomorrow ...

Peace,
I Am Syl

Prayer for Self-Love

Prayer for Self-Love (Don Miguel Ruiz – The Mastery of Love)

Today, Creator of the Universe, we ask that you help us to accept ourselves just the way we are, without judgment. Help us to accept our mind the way it is, with all our emotions, our hopes and dreams, our personality, our unique way of being. Help us to accept our body just the way it is, with all its beauty and perfection. Let the love we have for ourselves be so strong that we never again reject ourselves or sabotage our happiness, freedom, and love.

From now on, let every action, every reaction, every thought, every emotion, be based on love. Help us, Creator, to increase our self-love until the entire dream of our life is transformed, from fear and drama to love and joy. Let the power of self-love be strong enough to break all the lies we were programmed to believe – all the lies that tell us we are not good enough, or strong enough, or intelligent enough, that we cannot make it.  Let the power of our self-love be so strong that we no longer need to live our life according to other people’s opinions. Let us trust ourselves completely to make the choices we must make. With our self-love, we are no longer afraid to face any responsibility in our life or face any problems and resolve them as they arise. Whatever we want to accomplish, let it be done with the power of self-love.

Starting today, help us to love ourselves so much that we never set up any circumstances that go against us. We can live our life being ourselves and not pretending to be someone else just to be accepted by other people. We no longer need other people to accept us or tell us how good we are because we know what we are. With the power of our self-love, let us enjoy what we see every time we look in the mirror. Let there be a big smile on our face that enhances our inner and outer beauty. Help us to feel such intense self-love that we always enjoy our own presence.

Let us love ourselves without judgment, because when we judge, we carry blame and guilt, we have the need for punishment, and we lose the perspective of your love. Strengthen our will to forgive ourselves in this moment. Clean our minds of emotional poison and self-judgments so we can live in complete peace and love.

Let our self-love be the power that changes the dream of our life. With this new power in our hearts, the power of self-love, let us transform every relationship we have, beginning with the relationship we have with ourselves. Help us to be free of any conflict with others. Let us be happy to share our time with our loved ones and to forgive them for any injustice we feel in our mind. Help us to love ourselves so much that we forgive anyone who has ever hurt us in our life.

Give us the courage to love our family and friends unconditionally, and to change our relationships in the most positive and loving way. Help us to create new channels of communication in our relationships so there is no war of control, there is no winner or loser. Together let us work as a team for love, for joy, for harmony.

Let our relationship with our family and friends be based on respect and joy so we no longer have the need to tell them how to think or how to be. Let our romantic relationship be the most wonderful relationship; let us feel joy every time we share ourselves with our partner. Help us to accept others just the way they are, without judgment, because when we reject them, we reject ourselves. When we reject ourselves, we reject you.

Today is a new beginning. Help us to start our life over beginning today with the power of self-love. Help us to enjoy our life, to enjoy our relationships, to explore life, to take risks, to be alive, and to no longer live in fear of love. Let us open our heart to the love that is our birthright. Help us to become Masters of Gratitude, Generosity, and Love so that we can enjoy all of your creation forever and ever. Amen.

Peace

I AM Syl

Lessons learnt - on self love and of choice

I've come to the end of the book The Mastery of Love (by Don Miguel Ruiz) - with one final chapter to go. The final chapter being: God Within You.  I am sure I will get to talk about that again in a later entry since that seems to be a perennial topic (for me at least).

Anyway, I am eager to put down on "paper" the lessons (some of them anyway) I take from this book - and tomorrow I will return the book to the city library for others to read.  As I mentioned earlier, not exactly easy reading this book. At least not to me. Some parts seem particularly "deep" (whatever that means) - and others can seem coarse and even sarcastic. But I will not say that those may be my own perception - borne of a pattern I have come to be accustomed to. So perhaps, they aren't sarcastic at all - but simply the truth (as Don puts it) or a version of the Truth.  Whatever it may be - I've also concluded before that we have the choice to take from any situation lessons we want .. things or ideas that resonate with us.  So for me, below are two of the most pertinent points I would like to take with me.  They aren't so much "new" ideas or lessons - but perhaps reinforcers of what is already known. After all, all of knowledge is already within us - if we all originate from the same Divine Source.  So much of life's journey is about re-learning or more accurately remembering the Truth.

The first is the idea that we need to love ourselves.  Truly deeply love ourselves.  Over the years, I have given numerous talks on the need to love ourselves - and have been challenged by so many that this inevitably encourages egocentricity. Worse of all, it may even lead to chaos in a society if we all just did what we want to do without regard for others.  But I think loving one self is not about disregarding others.  It simply is learning to be full - to be complete - to be whole as opposed to be broken and incomplete needing to find peace and love and all that we seek in someone or something outside of ourselves.  Like all these truth - there is an element of paradox in them.

I take from Don's work that, as I've heard many other masters say before as well, we truly need to understand what love is before we can even love another.  We cannot give away what we do not have.  If we do not have love within ourselves - then how are we to love (give love) to another? In fact, what seems to happen to many of us is the believe that we are incomplete and we need to fill ourselves - so we search our entire life for the person (or relationship) that will fulfill us - that will give us love.  But in that search, because of our perceived need - we fear.  We fear rejection, we fear when we do not meet up to the standard we think another has of us - and we unconsciously seek to protect ourselves.  Our giving then becomes conditional. I will love you, IF you love me.  I will love you, if you do this or do that or meet my expectations.  And of course no one can ever meet all our expectations - and there lies our vicious cycle. When they "fail" us and we are hurt - we withdraw or we also exert behaviours that will hurt too.

When we are able to understand that love - unconditional love first begins within ourselves and we are able to come to recognition that we are from the Source created in the image of the Divine and as such are divine as well .. we will be able to love ourselves with honesty and completely. And when we are able to do that, we will be able to love others in the same manner - unconditionally. These two cannot be separated. They go hand-in-hand.  To borrow the phrase used by Jesus when asked what is the greatest commandment, He said - "Love the Lord you God with all your heart, your mind and your soul." But not stopping there (although He was only asked about the greatest commandment), He added, "And love your neighbours as yourself."  Not more than yourself - and not less than yourself.  I guess, for me, that means when we truly find this Love of God - we will also automatically love ourselves.  We cannot do otherwise because we are God's creation.  If God is perfect, how could you be less since you are His creation. To despise any part of you, will be to despise the work of God.  And so, loving the Lord your God will all you might will also mean you love yourself. And loving yourself will undoubtedly also lead you to loving others - without thought without condition for when you love yourself completely you will also see God in others for we are all from the One Source - all created alike.

Second lesson I take from this reading is the idea that we have a choice.  How we interpret events, how we define things actions and choices by others - these determine our happiness and our sense of peace.  Yesterday I wrote about the idea of "let's not be so quick to judge" - and let's learn to respect the differing views of others.  We are all on the same journey back to where we have come from.  Wayne says it as  - We are for No Where and we are Now Here journeying back to No Where. We are all on our way Home.  But there are many paths to the same destination - and we are all on different points on that journey.  I don't know what another has been through - and what their individual lessons are up to this point when our lives cross.  So, I should not be able to judge them nor should I attempt to decide for them.  I only need to make choices that are "right" to me and trust that others will continue their journey guided by their idea of God or the Universe.  It is not my place to move the rock, so to speak (in reference to an earlier posting) - but moving them and changing them if that is what needs to happen is for God to do.

So, I want to be able to make choices for myself - to choose happiness over pain. Instead of being a victim who is persecuted by others or by life, I know I have a choice to be in pain or to be in gratitude.  I choose gratitude - as often as I can. I choose to be free and to be happy.

Many will not agree with me - but that's okay.  Because this is my journey .. my travel in search of understanding myself .. my journey in search of understanding God (and thereby others as well). As with my previous writings, I am sure this will not gain favor from everyone who reads it.  Perhaps, even in examining how I respond to Don's writing where I describe it as "sarcastic," some will deem my writing insane.  And that's ok.  It won't be the first time I've been called that. In fact, when I was about 18 - a priest even described me a heretic.  That's perfectly fine.  I will not take these personally.

Peace to us all,

I AM Syl

Breastfeeding - A Quick Judgment

Yesterday I had a very interesting conversation with a friend I thought I would like to share here today.  The conversation centred around an issue raised by someone we both know.  The issue? It was about a lady who took a selfie apparently of herself breastfeeding (well obviously of herself since it is a selfie, right?)  But I have to admit, I didn’t get to see the picture since it was just dialogue with no inclusion of any photos.  Barring that, I was curious why there were these criticism of this lady for taking such a shot.

One of the reasons for the uproar apparently is because the act in itself is “insensitive.” It was suggested that the lady should have been considerate of all those mothers who are unable to breastfeed. “Don’t you think this would make them feel very sad – to be reminded that they cannot breastfeed?” (Although I am quoting this – it is actually a paraphrase .. no word for word as it is translated into English.)  My response? Really? This means one is being insensitive? If that is the reasoning, should we ban everyone (not just women) who post pictures of their babies after delivery? Parents, grandparents and the likes. They should be more sensitive to others, right? I mean think of all those who are not able to bear children for whatever reasons. What about those who loss their child at birth? Wouldn’t this cause such immense pain to them? And since it will result in pain in others – let’s not display pictures of our babies or celebrating their birthdays etc in public. Else, we would be showing the world how insensitive we are.

Another reason raised was that – this is a private act.  It should not be shown in public because it is inappropriate and I find it offensive. Others will find it offensive.  Again, Really? Is that good justification to velify another? Because I find their behaviour “offensive?” Who determines what is “appropriate” and what is not? Is your value any better than mine or that of another? You may say “a lot of people find it offensive.” And I may also say “a lot of people may also think it is perfectly natural.” And if we go by that method, should it be democratically decided? Let’s have a vote. If more people say it is not ok, then it is not ok? And if majority say it is ok, then it becomes ok?  Is it a fact that majority means it is “right?”  So how do we decide if it is okay or it is not? Perhaps we should start by asking ourselves why it is that we find certain things – certain behaviours by others objectionable. Are we just responding to social conditioning? It is wrong because it is wrong? Why? Because. It just is. There is no why. Or – because my dad says so, or my teacher says so, or my religion says so and on and on.  Perhaps that’s where we should begin to check our own values. Where do these values come from? Do they even make sense? Some rules may have made sense when they were established, but people evolve. Society changes. Perhaps some rules and regulations no longer apply. So if we are ourselves evolving – then perhaps, just perhaps it might behove us (and everyone else) to examine why we feel what we feel.

For me – the bottom line is, our actions should not be made with the intent to hurt another. But while we respect others, there is also a need to respect ourselves.  We are free (or should be) to celebrate our being. And what a beautiful celebration it is to be able to bear a child, to nurse the child – and how and why should this be offensive to another.  It is nature! Nature at its best in fact.

So, if I may invite us all to look ourselves in the mirror and start examining some, if not all, of what we feel is right and wrong. And challenge ourselves to examine these values – if they are useful for the betterment of humanity – for you and for me.  As Wayne Dyer puts it “In any situation where you can be right or be kind, choose to be kind. Always.”

Let’s not be so quick in our judgment of others.  My friend said (although he withdrew the statement later) that the lady must have been out for attention.  Just an attention seeking action.  Let’s refrain from making judgment on another because in all honesty – there is no way I can know what is in that person’s heart or mind.  Even if I may think I know you – but I can never know everything about you .. how you think, how you feel, and all that because I do not walk in your shoes. I have not gone through all that you have.  So – let’s work on “I will not judge you, and I ask that you please do not judge me either.”

Peace,
I AM Syl

A Crazeee dream

This is a crazy dream I had way back in 18 Nov 2009 (well 17 Nov actually since I wrote it on the 18th after I had the dream).  I was looking thru an old blog site of mine and came across this story. Started reading it - and thought what an odd story.  For some reason - I feel a connection .. so I decided to repost that dream here.  Don't go crazy over it, ok? hahaha  Here goes:

These are from last night (or early this morning). Can't recall all the minor details .. but I wanna just record down some things perhaps in point form in case I wish to return to this point at a later date to examine/re-examine them. So anyway .... the dream:

I was living in some house in something like a farm area .. I don't know why since the house does not resemble any I have ever been in (and I have been in a lot of houses/apartments etc). But at any rate ... I am starting off here sort of in the middle of the dream already cos I can't remember all the lead up to it (even when I woke up from the dream to write all these down).

So at this point in the dream .. I was in a house in some estate (this is a Western estate as opposed to a Malaysian "rubber" estate type if you guys are trying to visualize this). At this point - I have in my mind (in the dream) an image of some evil creature we need to eliminate. It is kinda small .. troll like .. something you would have seen in a movie or something - but I am not very good at describing it right this moment .. except that it is small, troll-like, with sharp ears .. and I think even sharp teeth .. yaya something like the green goblin I suppose. Ok anyway .. this creature has two helpers I guess .. and he has possessed them or somehow controls them .. they are humans. But they function along with the goblin to kill anyone who expresses any indication of aggression or anger. 

So in the dream I remember thinking to myself .. they are mighty dangerous to be set loose on our soil as many people would die (hmmm but now to think of it - maybe that wont be so bad, huh? we can set them loose in the some legislative assembly somewhere so they can eliminate those ignorant pigs and dogs who are always vulgar and rude and agressive - woops .. I digress. I wonder if I could end up in jail for sedition or something. Who knows in this age and time in our country). (Oh my gosh .. I just realized - they would have killed me for those words I just expressed above since they are so laced with anger, resentment blah blah blah). Anyway .. ok ok I'll get back to the story ....

Well in the dream because I had considered them dangerous .. we had somehow captured them and had them locked up. I don't know who the "we" are .. or how we captured them .. just that we did. And now .. they have escaped.

I am like in the back of the house .. and I know they have broken out of the house (presumably they were locked up in the back) and now I had to block the door where they exited. Since they busted the lock, all I could do was to find objects to block that path.

Then I recall my eldest brother going to his room - which strangely was here in the back part of the house. Anyway, I thot that would not be safe so I suggested to him that since we can't really lock up the back part now that the back door is busted that he might want to consider moving to the upstairs of our house instead. He agreed with no fuss .. and started to move towards the inner part of the house. And then I wondered "hmm .. he is moving so slow and may have difficulty getting to the upstairs. We are all in danger if he takes too long cos no telling if the goblin and his gang will be back anytime soon."

The scene now changes to the outside of the house .. it is evening time and we just had a recent downpour (this incidentally matches the real condition in my area recently as we have been having rain for the past days). So here I am .. walking around the outside of the house. And this is where I can tell we live in some farm or estate because you can see a large wide piece of land .. with a house .. and fences and a barn nearby etc .. you know, just like you would see ... mmm maybe like in Smallville? oh well anyway .. I noticed that our poles holding up the wires/rope to put out clothes to be dried has fallen down. I am not sure if this was the work of the goblin as he made his escape or as a result of the rain .. but anyway .. the poles are down and the laundry on the ground.

I move over to pick up the laundry .. and we have two dogs around .. tho now I can only remember how one of them looks like. And as I move towards the laundry on the ground .. this one dog, a big brown, shaggy dog - which was asleep - leaps up and comes toward me. I shout at it "whoa!" and he immediately stops. He recognizes me .. and now trotters over to me. I thot to myself .. "wow, this is a good dog. He will attack enemies and protect us."

I bend over to pick up the laundry .. I remember them now to be a brown towel, and a bed sheet. I pick them up and move back towards the house. At this point one of the dog runs off towards the barn .. and the brown dog follows me. He seems to wanna play and is tugging at the sheet. I am thinking while this is a nice dog .. he is kinda smelly at the moment because of his hair and the dampness in the air due to the rain-storm. So I am trying to usher him away .. but he refuses and follows me anyway .. into the house. I thought to myself again .. I need to get the dog out of the house before I close up and seal the exit. So I drop the laundry inside and lead the door back out of the house .. thinking I will take him to the other dog and hope to distract him while I run back into the house.

So he follows me. I round the corner of the house looking out for the other dog .. but do not see him. But Brown dog gets distracted for a moment (with what I don't recall) and I think to myself .. this is the time for me to make a break. So I run off .. round the corner again .. and I bump into this old couple. Now in the dream I know them to be my grandparents .. but of course they do not look like my real-life grandparents. Well, I never knew either of my grand fathers since they were both gone when I was born. But I did know my paternal grand mother, and this is not her. Nor is she my maternal grandmother whom I have only seen in photos.

I stop to chat with the old couple. Grandpa says to me .. "he is a good watch dog. He might be useful to you to have in the house." Grandma, on the other hand says "when you serve the host (she means the "eucharist") later on ., be sure to put some on the table (i.e., the altar). I asked her why, and she answers "because the goblin (of course she didn't refer to him as a goblin .. it's just the name I am using now) is afraid of it." She goes on to to explain to me that the goblin likes to lie on the table and although I can't see him, he is there. So putting a host on the table will drive him away. And I think to myself "I must remember this .. to put a piece of the eucharist on the altar later .. apparently i was going to be attending some camping trip where I will be presenting the hosts to participants. I think this is a reference to my university days when I was in the US.

Then I move back towards the house (how terrible - I didn't even think to ask the old folks to get in or worry about them. Oh well.) I get back in and just as I closed the door .. old faithful Brown dog is back at the door trying to get in. I bolt the door and he is pawing at it to get in. It is a glass door so I can see him and he can see me.

My mom was at that part of the back cos it looks like there is a stove right next to this back door where I am at now. She sees me struggling with the door and I ask her if I should let the dog in .. but she is thinking about it .. and good old Brown is still trying to push his way in .. and I am afraid the door is going to give .. and since there is no answer from my mom .. and I think this is taking too long .. i decided to open the door and let old Brown in.

And the dream ends there .. I wake up .. grab my notebook and scribble all these down.

Told you this was a Crazy Dream!! What the heck does it all mean??? Hahahaha

Peace
Syl

"Shit Happens"

"Shit happens – Everything happens for a reason"

Indeed, shit happens. Everyday.  To be healthy, it is believed that we should have bowel movements once a day, right? This is a natural and healthy process that our bodies know to do daily.  And it does this because it needs to eliminate “waste” product from our bodies. Our physical body.

Wouldn’t it make sense then that perhaps the same is true for our emotional body? That is – we need to take a crap daily? To remove similar emotional “waste” from our body?

A doctor friend of mine recently wrote in her FB status: “everything happens for a reason. shit happens.” And when I pointed out to her “ Yes. Shit happens everyday. so that we clean out our system.” She replied with a “cut the toxic out of your life (tongue emoticon)”

Indeed. It is a daily process – to remove the toxicity from our lives – the toxic people, the toxic ideas, the toxic situations. (Not: toxic does not imply bad as in evil – but rather those things, events, people that do not enrich us .. do not help us to feel good about ourselves or our lives.)  It is a process. In fact, it should be a daily process – to cleanse our souls from the things that do not benefit is .. and if they do, then rejoice, be grateful for them and the shit is no longer shit, right? Make sense?

Many people, in fact all of us – at one point or another will lament the “shit” that is in our lives. In all our lives. We all experience those “down” times. And it ok to SOL as opposed to LOL (Shout Out Loud instead of Laugh Out Loud). Shout it at the top of your voice – “this is shit.” It’s perfectly ok to do that. It’s call venting and can be cathartic. But when the emotions simmer down – and we are able to be who we truly are – the spirit within – “a spiritual being having a human experience” – we will be able to go beyond that “shit and recognize that indeed “everything happens for a reason.”  There is something to be gained .. to be learned in all situations be they “good” or “bad.” If we believe in a Divine all-knowing being that is Greater than us all – then we must surely know (not just believe) that all things indeed have a purpose for us.

Many people resent being told this – that “there is a reason for everything.” No doubt this is understandable. But it is our emotions of the moment – our EGO – that make us resist that notion. Not just resist but even resent it. No – in the midst of pain (and fear) – those words are meaningless. They may even like salt in a wound. Pain, right? But then … salt in a wound can help in the healing process, right? Or alcohol. Imagine when you put alcohol to your wound to clean the wound and prevent infection. Doesn’t that just bite? Sure there is pain – but behind that pain, is a process of healing – of cleansing. They say that time heals all wounds. In fact, it is not time that heals .. it is US (you and me – not the United States).  It is how we interpret that wound. It is how we respond to that wound. We can send it love and begin the healing process, or we can continue to focus negatively on it and keep the wound alive. The choice is ours. It has always been ours. In fact, there is a saying that goes, "what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger."

Some people tell me this concept is a cop-out.  It is just to make ourselves feel better. Just like the idea of a god. There is no god, they say. It’s just a concept humans made up to make ourselves feel better in the face of adversity and pain. My response? And so it may be. So what? Does the idea cause me more pain? Does it cause me harm in anyway? If it does not, and it makes you stronger and helps you pick yourself up – then why not? Do it. Change your perspective. Choose to be happy. It’s up to you. You can choose to live day-to-day cursing life and complaining that “shit happens – and it always happens to me.” Or you can take the so called “bad” and make it into something that benefits you. Let that be a choice. Your choice. 

Peace

Syl

Perception - Interpretation - and Love

Perception – Interpretation and Love

I think I’ve skipped a day of writing to ponder on the stuff I read from Don Miguel Ruiz. Real deep – and while the things he speaks of sound so familiar, I can’t help but to think “so harsh.” So much of what is said sounds even sarcastic at times .. but perhaps these are just my perception, my interpretation – and perhaps I am just not comfortable with the “Reality Therapy” type approach – and never did quite “connect” with Albert Ellis.  I must say too tho that until recently when reading Dr. Wayne Dyer’s take on Albert Ellis and how he influenced Wayne’s own “work on earth” – I always thought the guy was too harsh and didn’t see much value in RET (Rational Emotive Therapy). But having read Wayne’s words – I am open to re-learning about Ellis’ approach. 

And so, perhaps my “running into” Don’s work while actually intending to pick up another book from Wayne is part of the journey I need to go through to be more open to ideas that I once thought held little to no significance for me. Some of his words and examples, I found pretty extreme and hard to relate to. Others made a lot of sense, yet – those “exaggerations” (or what I considered exaggerations) were hard to swallow. Maybe they seemed like exaggerations to me because in some ways they seem so paradoxical. I am not sure. But at any rate, again I think – the fact that the book was in my hands and I was reading it, there is a message for me to take from it. This too inline with my earlier blog entry regarding the not throwing out the baby with the bath water. There is always something we can learn from any situation, something we can learn from any one. It’s up to us.

It is interesting (to me at least) that when I was pondering this, I got into a conversation with my sister and I was talking to her about people’s expectations and how I felt attempts from others to “guilt” me into this action or that action.  Her gentle chastise (or maybe just a reminder) was – “is this your perception of being ‘guilt-ed’ when there is no such intent meant?”  I was already sensing that at some level when I related the incident to her, and here it was right in my face (in a nice way of course) – yes, indeed it is just simply my own interpretation of being “guilt-ed” or manipulated to behave in a way I think is expected of me.

Two (of many points) made by Don – (1) we can never know what is in the heart/mind of another. What they want, want they are trying to communicate all that is our guess – we guess. But we don’t have to. We just need to be clear ourselves. We can’t make people be clear because that is them and we have no ability, no right to control another. We can only manage our own self.  So be clear with what we want, and then to follow through with what we feel is right to do.  Don’t second guess another. (2) When we try to second guess another and try to do what we think they want – we are operating on, what he termed, the “track of fear.”  We do what we do because we feel obligated. We want to do what is “right” so the other will not be hurt, will not be disappointed, will not be angry etc. Our actions are based on “fear” not on “love.” We do what we do so that the other will not get upset with us – worse still if they get upset, they may take from us what we think we NEED from them – their love, their approval, their respect, their admiration.  But when we can be clear with what we want ourselves and know that Love, Happiness, Joy, Peace, Contentment and all that comes from within – we will no longer operate from the “track of fear.”  Instead, we will be on “track of love.”

When we give – give because we want to, and not because we have to. Love is something you give freely – not as an exchange with another. But isn’t this what we all seem to do? I love you, therefore you must love me too. If you do not, then I will be hurt. And then I will have to find some way to protect myself from this pain – and when I am doing that, I may (unconsciously even) do things to hurt you back – because it is your fault I feel pain.  But is it the other person’s fault? Perhaps it is – or they may seem to contribute to our pain. But ultimately we need to learn to love without expectation. We need to know that in us is already all the love we need.

As I move on with this lesson, I ask – I pray – I intent .. let me move on to learn to love like the sun, to borrow the words of the Persian Poet – Hafiz, “you don’t owe me.” The sun shines because it is in it’s nature to do so. It cannot do otherwise. 

And the paradox is: when we freely give it (Love) away, it (Love) will come looking for us.

Shalom,
Syl

Understanding "Love"

For today, let me share with you something I am reading currently.  I am just going to put in here today - a section I have extracted directly form The Mastery of Love (by Don Miguel Ruiz)

I haven't processed it fully - so I will revert and add my take on this as I further digest it.  For now, it is just directly - his words.  Here goes ..

Love is unconditional. Fear is full of conditions. In the track of fear, I love you if you let me control you, if you are good to me, if you fit into the image I make for you. I create an image of the way you should be, and because you are not and never will be the image I create, I judge you because of that, and find you guilty. Many times I even feel ashamed of you because you are not what I want you to be. If you don’t fit that image I created, you embarrass me, you annoy me, I have no patience at all with you. I am just pretending kindness. In the track of love, there is no if; there are no conditions. I love you for no reason, with no justification. I love you the way you are. If I don’t like the way you are, then I would be with someone who is the way I like her to be. We don’t have the right to change anyone else, and no one else has the right to change us. If we are going to change, it is because we want to change, because we don’t want to suffer anymore.

In the track of fear we have so many conditions, expectations, and obligations that we create a lot of rules just to protect ourselves against emotional pain, when the truth is that there shouldn’t be any rules. These rules affect the quality of the channels of communication between us, because when we are afraid, we lie. If you have the expectation that I have to be a certain way, then I feel obligation to be that way. The truth is I am not what you want me to be When I am honest and I am what I am, you are already hurt, you are mad. Then I lie to you, because I am afraid of your judgment. I am afraid you are going to blame me, find me guilty, and punish me. And ever time you remember, you punish me again and again and again for the same mistake.

If we are in a war of control, it is because we have no respect. The truth is that we don’t love. It is selfishness, not love; it is just to have the little does that make us feel good. When we have no respect there is a war of control because each person feels responsible for the other. I have to control you because I don’t respect you, because whatever happens to you is going to hurt me, and I want to avoid pain. Then, if I see that you are not being responsible, I am going to knock you all the time to make you responsible, but “responsible” form my personal point of view. It doesn’t mean that I am right.

This is what happens when we come from the track of fear. Because there is no respect, I act as though you are not good enough or intelligent enough to see what is good or not good for you. I make the assumption that you are not strong enough to go into certain situations and take care of yourself. I have to take control and say, “Let me do it for you,” or “Don’t do that.” I try to suppress your half of the relationship and take control of the whole thing. If I take control of the whole relationship, where is your part? It doesn’t work.

Peace,

Syl

Don't throw out the baby with the bathwater

Let me share with you something I encountered this morning. I received a message shared by a former colleague of mine in a Whatsapp group I am in.  His message went as follows:

"Rich Dad, Poor Dad now a bankrupt dad: Best-selling author files for corporate bankruptcy after ... http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2215642/Rich-Dad-Poor-Dad-bankrupt-dad-Best-selling-author-files-corporate-bankruptcy-losing-24m-judgement.html?ito=whatsapp_share_mobile-top"

A good friend of mine (who happens to be the Administrator of the Whatsapp group) responded shortly there after with:

That does not mean his teachings/philosophy that has helped so many people become successful does not work, eh?

The reply to this was: "will U stil support or condone any lecturer who plagarizes the work of others? I won't."

And at 8:30 AM while I was still enjoying my Saturday breakfast, I had to ask the question, was that why he filed for bankruptcy? And if not, was this not an unfair comparison?   To which, the reply was:

Syl,
a. I am using an analogy.
b. Kiyosaki used the Annex Learning system to secure speaking assignments n did not compensate d owner. It is obvious the intention to deceive existed.
c. In my opinion, a person's integrity is far more imp than who he hs bcome. The implication on others far exceeds his/her indiscretion.

I am by no means a fan of Kiyosaki. In fact, I've never even read his book Rich Dad Poor Dad tho I know of it.  But then I also have nothing against him either. I guess the book which deals with how to become "successful" by becoming rich wasn't something that was fascinating to me - not quite my cup of tea type reading material I suppose. So I wasn't defending the man - that's for sure.

But I suppose it did peak my interest because it touched on something I've been thinking about lately. Well actually, for several months now.  As you all know, I AM a fan of Dr. Wayne Dyer and had recently read his book I Can See Clearly Now. Before this, I've never read any of his books - just extracts from among the 41 books to his name.  I've followed him mainly through the video recordings he was involved with for PBS (Public Broadcasting Service in the US) of which he was a big supporter.

Anyway, in the case of Dr. Dyer, a very close friend of mine had posted the question to me (when we heard of Dr. Dyer's passing sometime last year) that "if even a master like him could die this way, what hope is there for us?"  Many believe Wayne's passing was related to his battle with leukemia although no one knows for sure.  At least I don't know because when he died, the statement released from his family simply said he had passed away peacefully in the night. But anyway, my answer to my friend was "even if he did die of cancer, it doesn't mean he failed or that all he has been saying is wrong."  I reminded my friend then to re-read one of my favorite books (by Richard Bach) entitled "Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah." In that book, Richard's "master," Donald Shimoda, chose to die by way of a gun shot. I won't go into the whole detail of that scenario. I am sure you can pick that book up and read it if you are so inclined.

Back to my story with Wayne - since then a number of other people have also expressed to me that "he is such a fake;" "all those preaching - and he died of cancer;" "so - none of what he said was true;" "if he was so aligned with the Source, couldn't he have healed himself?" And on and on.  As often the case, I admit - I don't have all the answers. In fact, I've wondered along some of those lines myself - choosing ultimately that there must be a reason why he died the "way" he died at the age of 75. Mind you, we are still proceeding with the notion that he died from his battle with cancer when that has not been established as a fact. But even if it is true, does that invalidate his life's work?  I keep in mind the impact of his work - through all the books he has written, the many lectures and presentations he has made, the numerous PBS programmes he developed raising over $250 million for PBS.  Are these all to be thrown out as being worthless - worse yet, to be deemed a fraud?

I think not. Certainly not my place to judge him as an individual - good or bad, fraud or not - His work has touched the lives of millions and brought peace and comfort to so many. These cannot be discounted as nothing.  As he was so fond of saying - there is a Divine force that moves us and directs our actions. There is no coincidence - everything unfolds as they should within a much greater plan. And although there are many times we cannot see the purpose of that unfolding, there is a Divine reason behind it. Of that, he had no doubt.  I share the same.

So it was - this morning's message, I suppose, was in a way to make me come to some clearer conclusion about this.  In very similar fashion, is Kiyosaki's work to be thrown out because of his decision (alleged) to "cheat" Bill Zanker, founder of Learning Annex? As I pondered this - and wanting to find out more about this man, Robert Kiyosaki - I did a little bit of digging. What I really want to share here is one of those articles I came across.  I think the writer of that article put it in such a beautiful way - I can only wish I could articulate half as beautifully as he (or she) did.  The article can be found at: http://moneyminiblog.com/investing/robert-kiyosaki-fraud/

The best part of the article, I thought, was:

"I think it’s important to know the background and a few things about the people we listen to, but ultimately, Robert does practice what he preaches for the most part.  Sure, he may not be 100% legitimate, but that doesn’t mean you can’t learn from him.  You can learn from anyone.  Take the good with the bad.  Eat the fish and spit out the bones.  However you want to word it, take knowledge away from everything.  You should be reading his books for wealth-building information, not moral guidance."

Let's pause before we judge. Let's do what we can to draw lessons from all the events in our lives.  Everything happens for a reason. Even in the "bad", we will be able to find God's hand at work.  Or as my good friend said, "Let's not throw out the baby with the bathwater."

"The mark of [our] ignorance is the depth of [our] belief in injustice and tragedy. What a caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly." (Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah)

Shalom,

Syl